Dream of becoming yourself

I don’t know whether there were many dry eyes around when our skipper went up to collect his jersey this weekend. Watching him stand there as his coach spoke I could see the emotion on his face. It made me wonder if he knew he was going to have such a huge impact on rugby and New Zealand when he was growing up.

We all dream of becoming someone big. Someone else. A legend in the eyes of everyone and yet none of us imagine of becoming the legends ourselves. The future legends of the worlds. Why dream of becoming the next JKR or Nora Roberts when I can become me. What’s stopping me but me? What’s stopping you but you?

Yeah I know that talk is easy. But you know what, if you’re willing to back it up with hard work, then it’s an awesome start to the best journey you can dream up.

I’ve never been one to shy away from a challenge and in two weeks I get to follow the dream with all my heart and have no excuse to stop me.

So you’ve heard it here first. The challenge is on:-)

You take care





Achieving what you believe

nelson quotes-4For me it’s countdown time. The last year has been challenging to say the least. Sometimes as hard headed as I am- I still haven’t learnt how to say No. I have this tendency to love helping people. Must be a genetic defect because mum has the same problem. Or maybe it comes with the nurse and need to heal thing. Whatever it is, I think I can say without a doubt that I have a weakness for saying yes, when I actually should be taking care of myself. Lucky for me my daughter  makes sure I don’t overdo it.

So the next few months are going to be jam packed. To start it off, I get to go for my First Australian Romance Writers Conference in Melbourne. I’m actually looking forward to it. Normally I’d be scared because I’m traveling alone and I don’t know anyone in Melbourne. RWA conferences are usually much bigger than RWNZ so it’s bound to be scary, but I’ve grown up somewhere along the way. Maybe I got better at faking being okay when I’m not, either way, it works:-)

When I get back we have our own RWNZ conference and as I’ve been planning it with some wonderful people all year, I am hoping for a fabulous conference. I also get to handover to the new President of RWNZ and get to have my life  back again. I won’t be able to be called the President anymore, but between you and me, I really won’t miss it.

Then there’s Armageddon with my baby girl. We get to meet the original Flash, stars from Arrow, and a few other popular TV shows. Last time I met McGyver, shook his hand and knew anything was possible as long as you tried hard.

Looking in, people might think life is perfect. I wish I could tell you it’s a box of birds. Life is never perfect and nothing is as it seems. People who make it look easy just struggled harder so it seems that way. People who are confident are really insecure at times and wonder when it’s all going to come tumbling down.

I can tell you that life is what you make of it and that you should believe in yourself and visualise what you want and it will happen. I can tell you it works and you might think I’m a little quirky.

But that being said, whatever you believe there’s only one thing that has to be important in your life. Be positive in your own life and don’t wish negativity on anyone else. Life is way to short for that sort of carry on.





Believe It or Not!!!

The last two weeks have been meh. Being someone who can’t stand the cold- it didn’t help that Auckland has been having a cold spell. At times like this it’s hard to be perky, especially when you’re trying to keep it all together. So after a strong dose of antibiotics to fight off a chest infection and after a jab of the good stuff to bring up the B12 levels, maybe perky is an understatement, but at least I’m feeling human again. Okay, almost human again. Anyway back to the important stuff, while I was in my ‘there has to be something better than this phase?’ I decided I was tired of doing nothing to help myself.

I know I’m meant to be busy planning conferences and focusing on being President of a Romance Writers organisation, but I wanted to do something for me. Something that would perk me up and make me believe that all this work and hard sweat was towards something.

So I set myself a goal and decided I would go all out to achieve it. After all, that’s what I do. At least that’s what I try my best to do. So I did my thing and gave it all I had and I hit #1 on the Amazon Best Seller List.

#4 in the Mystery/Thriller and Suspense List.

Do you know this means I can call myself a Best selling author. It’s not as prestigous as NYT or USA best selling, but it is best selling.

That’s huge. That’s a wow. I suppose it’s like making it into the minor leagues.

So my point is- great things do come to those who work hard to achieve their dreams. If you want something, you have to work at it. If you’re not willing to work at something or fight to achieve what you want, then it’s not worth the effort. So aim high, dream big and know that the work you put in will be rewarded.

Much good luck to you, I’m keeping my high for now:-)


number one best seller

Almost hump day!!

To me it feels more like a Monday than a Tuesday evening but what do I know. When you have busy weeks they all seem to melt into each other and you focus on getting through the day rather than thinking about the end of the week.

So you can tell, it’s the usual end of the quarter stuff, which for us in the medical world means, meet those health targets before June 30th. I could say a lot more about how I feel about pushing through lists but I’m too tired for a political debate.

So instead I will focus on this. While I was listening to my usual positive ‘No Excuses’ meditation, I could literally feel all the signs of stress I had. It’s one thing to know about the signs and talk to people about managing their stress levels, but it’s definitely a whole other thing when you have an outer body type experience and you can see yourself in a state of high anxiety.

Writing about it helps, hence the blog and the change in theme of the blog recently. But there is something else that helps too. Focus. Absolute focus on what the end goal is.

Absolute belief this is going to work out and everything will fall into place. So just when I feel I am coming down that slippery slide of hope-less-ness- I have to take a moment, take a breath, believe.

Yes it’s like holding onto something fragile , while being flushed by a huge force, but guess what, you don’t go on this journey alone.

It’s only when I am rushing around, trying to keep up, and find my daughter has my breakfast and coffee ready, that I realize, I am lucky. Really lucky to be given this chance to go after what I really want. Something my parents never had the chance to do. It’s a gift to be able to live your dream, one I am grateful for. It will be so easy to give up. So easy to slip back into the non believer, or the person who walks away from this all consuming need to be different. Be fulfilled. Be amazed at what the world can offer.

I know, it’s me rambling on again, but you know what. This keeps me focused. It keeps me grounded and when I can see that end goal and I know that every shift, every tired never ending day brings me a step closer to what I really want, then it’s worth it.

So again we go on this roller coaster. I think it’s okay to do that. As long as we recognize the signs of that oncoming bus or truck that has exhaustion and burn out in big bright letters on the side. So keep yourself safe.

Music, candles and meditation just to relax. Or maybe just take it easy and do nothing. Pace yourself. Because when your dream does come true, it’s going to be all go!!!

Believing in the Impossible

Growing up I was addicted to two things. Books and television. In exactly that order. I would read anything I could get my hands on, from Noddy to Nancy Drew and Hardy Boys, to every Mills and Boon book I could hide away from my English Teacher, to the cereal box when I was desperate.

When it came to television, I would watch all the dramas and series and one of my favourites was MacGyver. Did I ever think that one day, I would stand in front of him and shake his hand, or take a photo with him? That would be a NO. If you asked me 30 years ago, I would have told you, it was impossible. That never in a million years would I, an Indian girl from a small town in a country that practiced Apartheid would grow up to one day meet Richard Dean Anderson. But you know what, I did and it really happened.

So I have to believe that impossible things can become possible if you believe enough in yourself.

This weekend I met an amazing author who I am in awe of. She is brilliant and I want to be her when I grow up. I happened to think Karen Rose writes the most exciting and scintillating thrillers, and I got to have an actual conversation with her. It might not mean a lot to others, but to me, it means the world that she would give me advice and help me not be as fearful of the next step I am about to make.

I look around and am blessed with friends and even strangers who have  faith in this journey and the change in direction I am taking.

As scary as this is, and believe me it is one of the scariest things I have done in my life apart from hand my daughter the keys to my car, I look at my children and realise it is by believing in impossibilities coming true that, I have made the impossible seem possible for them. If I did that and my daughter can say with such surety she will meet her TV hero , then maybe somewhere along the way, I did something right:-)


Staying on track

I am sure two days ago it was Monday but the days seem to blur into each other and I find it difficult to keep on track. In the next few weeks I will be preparing to go back to South Africa, and if I am honest I can say that I am not looking forward to this trip. I wasn’t looking forward to it last year either. It’s always hard to say goodbye and this time it’s going to be different and there is nothing I can do to change that. So instead I am going to try and stay on track and focus on something that I can promise to do before the end of this year and have you all help me achieve this.
I am going to credit my talented daughter for her artistic eye and I do hope you all enjoy my next release that I hope to have out before December.
I started this book last year when I was taking care of my dad when he was ill in South Africa. I have found difficulty finishing it because I never got to grieve with my family. So this one is from the heart.